


Lost Years

by Catalina_Leigh



Series: Brothers [3]
Category: Stargate Atlantis, Stargate SG-1
Genre: Amnesia, Angst, Brothers, Childhood Memories, Family, Flashback, Friendship, Revelations, Team
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-10-15
Updated: 2018-10-15
Packaged: 2019-08-02 19:28:22
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 6
Words: 15,313
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16311293
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Catalina_Leigh/pseuds/Catalina_Leigh
Summary: When Colonel Sheppard wakes up with amnesia after a mission gone wrong, it throws everyone for a loop. Suspicions arise about whether it really is the colonel after he admits to remembering Daniel Jackson, but no one else in the program. So Dr. Jackson heads to Atlantis to set the record straight, and tries to help Sheppard regain his memories, with General O’Neill and Colonel Mitchell’s help.





	1. Prologue

**Author's Note:**

> This is set in the third season of SGA (after The Return but before Sunday), and season ten of SG-1 (post The Shroud). It's set up to answer a lot of questions the prior two stories caused.

Prologue - He’s My Brother

 

“How is he Carson?” Elizabeth asked, as much worry in her voice as was etched on her face.

Rodney, Teyla, and Ronon were gathered around as well. Ronon was leaning back against the wall with his arms crossed, his eyes fixed on the figure lying in the infirmary bed. Teyla had taken the chair beside the bed, watching all of her teammates with equal concern. Rodney had been pacing and tapping on his tablet, only pausing when Carson returned from his office with the test results.

The doctor had a steady expression, but his eyes gave away his own worry. “Physically, I can say that Colonel Sheppard will be fine. He’s got a small bump on his head. Possibly a concussion, but I can’t say for sure until he wakes up. His blood work is normal. As are all the other scans.”

“So why is he still unconscious?” Rodney demanded.

Elizabeth shot him a sharp look, and Teyla placed a hand on his arm.

“Head injuries are unpredictable Rodney,” Carson explained patiently. “His brain scan and EEG are normal. There is no fracture. At the moment, I’m not concerned about longterm damage. But he did take a pretty hard hit to the head. It’s impossible to predict the consequences until he wakes up.”

Rodney opened his mouth, but at that moment there was a groan from the bed.

Everyone immediately turned their attention to the colonel. Ronon made his way over to stand behind Teyla, so that he was closer but not in the doctor’s way. Elizabeth held Rodney back while Carson made his way over to examine his patient.

“John? Can you hear me?”

The colonel swatted the doctor’s hand away when Carson tried to shine a light in his eyes. “What happened?” he mumbled, still not opening his eyes, but rubbing a hand over his face as if to try and wake himself up.

“You got a pretty good knock on yer head, and have been unconscious for the last few hours,” Carson informed him. “Can ye open your eyes for me so I can get a quick peek at your pupil reaction?” he asked gently.

Scrunching up his face, the colonel reluctantly opened his eyes slowly, blinking several times before casting a nervous glance around and settling his gaze on the doctor.

Carson did a quick exam and nodded in satisfaction. “How are ye feelin’ lad?” But as his patient opened his mouth, the doctor quickly added, “And none of that ‘I’m fine’ nonsense. I want an honest answer.”

The colonel looked like he had been about to roll his eyes before deciding it was a bad idea. Instead, he rubbed his forehead and drawled, “I feel like someone took a sledgehammer to my head, but other than that —” He caught himself before finishing that sentence, but the doctor’s pursed lips indicated he’d heard it anyway.

“Log actually,” came Ronon’s rumbling voice.

While the rest of the people around the bed gave him disapproving scowls, the man in the bed just looked at the former Runner with furrowed brows. “Good to know…” he muttered unsurely. Turning back to the doctor, he asked casually, “So, where am I?”

This question had everyone’s eyes on him. He looked startled at their worried expressions.

“What do you remember?” Carson asked slowly.

“Uh… Not much. It’s all kinda fuzzy,” was the shrugged reply.

“Do you know your name?” Carson continued. He remained professional and steady, despite the concern pouring off the others.

“John. Sheppard,” he answered easily. But then he furrowed his brows again, and retorted, “Who are you?”

The people standing around his bed all exchanged anxious glances.

“He’s kidding, right?” Rodney tried to laugh, but his voice broke.

“Rodney,” Elizabeth admonished. Ignoring his posturing, she turned to John and explained calmly, “I’m Dr. Elizabeth Weir. I’m in charge of this expedition.”

“‘Expedition’?” John interrupted in confusion, but she continued as if he hadn’t.

“You are Lieutenant Colonel John Sheppard. You’re the military commander of this base.”

Now John’s eyebrows shot up high enough to be hidden by his hair. “I actually did it? I actually joined the Air Force?” The honest surprise in his voice increased the concern on the others’ faces.

“You don’t recognize any of us?” Carson questioned carefully.

John shook his head. “Not a bit.”

“I am Teyla Emmagan,” Teyla introduced politely. “We met when you came to my village shortly after the expedition arrived.”

Returning her smile, he replied, “Nice to meet you Teyla.”

“This is Ronon Dex, and Dr. Rodney McKay,” Teyla introduced the others.

Ronon gave him a nod, which John returned. The other doctor was muttering something about this being ridiculous. John’s mouth twitched, but he held back the smirk. Though the twinkle in Teyla’s eyes, and Ronon’s own smirk, said they saw it anyway.

“And I am Dr. Carson Beckett. I’ve been your primary doctor for the past three years,” Carson finished.

John nodded slowly. His expression was wary, but he was trying to project a friendly air.

“Physically, all of yer scans and blood work came back clean. You’ve got a wee bump on your head, and probably a concussion. So I’d like to keep you for observation,” Carson informed him matter-of-factly. His face turned cautious when he added, “What has me concerned is the memory loss. Obviously, you’re missing quite a bit o’ time. I’m hopeful it’s just temporary. But I cannae say for certain.” Noticing his patient nodding, but looking increasingly drowsy, Carson smiled. “Why don’ you rest, and I’ll check back on ye in a bit?”

The corner of his mouth turned up, John settled down further in the covers and let his eyes closed as he mumbled, “Sounds good Doc.”

Carson gestured for the others to give the man some privacy. Teyla and Ronon both nodded, and cast one final look at their team leader before moving to the end of the bed where Elizabeth was attempting to get Rodney to move.

“Maybe that statue did something to him,” Rodney was saying, snapping his fingers before tapping on his tablet once more. “There was no energy reading coming from it, but you never know.”

“What did the Ancient database say about it, again?” Elizabeth asked.

“Uh… Unclear,” Rodney admitted hesitantly, but shrugged. “We found the gate address and something about there having been Ancients there at one point.”

Her lips were pursed, and brows furrowed, but Elizabeth nodded. “Maybe we can send the entry to Dr. Jackson. He might know or be able to get more than we could,” she suggested.

“Daniel?”

All eyes immediately went back to the man lying in the bed with his eyes closed who had quietly muttered the name.

Rodney brightened considerably. “HA! I knew you were faking!” he proclaimed, stabbing a finger towards his friend, receiving sharp looks from everyone else.

John slowly opened his eyes to stare at the scientist in bewilderment. “What are you talking about?”

“You remember Dr. Jackson, so obviously you remember us too.” Rodney stated it like it was obvious.

But John didn’t move, just drawled, “If you’re talking about Daniel Jackson, then yeah, I know him. But I don’t know you guys. Sorry.” He shrugged, and at least looked somewhat apologetic.

“That’s impossible! You met Carson, Elizabeth, and I the same day you met Daniel,” Rodney argued, ignoring Carson’s warning look and the other’s glares.

Raising his eyebrows, John looked Rodney dead in the eyes and said slowly, but firmly, “No, I didn’t.” Lightening his tone some, he continued, “I know Daniel Jackson. I don’t know you.”

Now, everyone but John were wearing confused expressions.

Watching the man who had again closed his eyes and was making himself comfortable in the bed, Elizabeth spoke carefully. “John… How do you know Daniel?”

The answer came in a sleepy mumble. “He’s my brother.”


	2. Chapter 1

Chapter 1 - I _Am_ His Brother

 

“What’s going on?” Daniel asked as soon as he entered the conference room where Landry, Jack, and Cam were already gathered, the hairs on his arms raising with a sense of trepidation.

His team leader just shrugged, looking as confused as Daniel. “I was wondering that myself. But I just got here.”

Jack, however, was giving his friend a steady look, and told him, “We received a message from Atlantis.”

Daniel froze for a moment. Keeping his eyes on Jack, he phrased his question in a calm, controlled manner. “Is everyone okay?”

But it was Landry who answered. “Seems like Colonel Sheppard has amnesia,” he stated bluntly, with a healthy dose of skepticism laced in the word ‘amnesia’. “Though, there are some concerns that it might not actually _be_ Colonel Sheppard, or that there is some kind of alien influence going on.”

“What?” Daniel’s reply was short, and his eyebrows had raised in consternation.

Cam, too, had straightened at the general’s words, face scrunched up in an inquisitive expression.

Rolling his eyes, Jack quipped, “He doesn’t remember them, or even that he’s an Air Force officer, so they’re a little freaked out and jumping to the worst case scenario.”

The general’s succinct explanation had Daniel relaxing slightly, and Cam nodding in understanding.

General Landry, on the other hand, shook his head.

Daniel ignored him, and surmised to Jack, “So, he’s fine. He just has amnesia?”

Jack nodded. “He’s got a bump on the head, and a mild concussion, but Dr. Beckett said physically he’s ok. Sheppard’s just missing quite a few years of memories.”

“Then what’s the problem?” It was Cam asking this time. “Are they worried he won’t get his memory back?”

“The _problem_ is _what_ he remembers,” Landry inserted with a firm look. Ignoring Jack’s eye roll, he looked at Daniel and said with an air of dubiousness, “He claims to remember you Dr. Jackson. Except he seems to be under the impression you’re his brother.”

Cam’s eyebrows went up in surprise.

Daniel merely looked at Jack, who seemed to be restraining a sigh. “So, other than the amnesia, he’s fine?” His tone was casual. He was more relaxed now that he knew what was going on.

Jack nodded, but it was Landry who responded incredulously. “He thinks you’re his brother! Obviously, he’s not ‘fine’. Either _something_ is messing with his brain, or it’s not really Sheppard.”

Now Daniel rolled his eyes, and glared at the general. “I _am_ his brother. So, forgive me, but I’m really not seeing the issue other than the fact he can’t remember most of his adult life.” His tone and expression were hard and unrelenting.

While Landry spluttered, and Jack smirked, Cam turned his gaze to his teammate and canted his head. “Really?” His voice didn’t hold any of the cynicalness Landry’s had, just honest surprise and curiosity.

Daniel looked at him and nodded simply. “Yes.”

Cam’s face relaxed into a shrug. “Huh.”

The urge to smirk at the colonel’s easy acceptance was strong, but instead the archaeologist turned his attention back to the generals.

Landry had regained his equilibrium, and was looking at Daniel with something that could have been pity. “Dr. Jackson, I can appreci—”

Whatever he was going to say was cut off by Jack’s impatient, “Oh for cryin’ out loud. Get over it Hank. It’s in both of their files if you paid attention.”

Now, Landry had furrowed his brows and was looking at Jack in bewilderment.

Jack didn’t give him the opportunity to respond though. “And I made sure Daniel was listed as Sheppard’s next of kin. It’s so much simpler when they’re already read in.” The second part was added under his breath. Turning businesslike, he looked at Daniel when he added, “Transport to Atlantis via Midway in thirty minutes. Go get packed.”

Daniel nodded and turned to leave when Cam spoke.

“Sir, I’d like to go too.” When everyone looked at him, Cam shrugged and reasoned, “I met Sheppard in flight school. If he doesn’t remember the recent past…”

“He still might remember you,” Jack finished with a nod. “Permission granted. Go get packed.”

Cam nodded and followed Daniel out of the conference room, leaving one general scowling and the other with his eyebrows raised in a challenge. On their way down the hall, the colonel nudged his teammate and gave him a reassuring smile. “Hey, don’t worry. Sheppard’ll be fine. He’s a stubborn son of a bitch.”

Daniel sighed heavily. “Yeah. That’s what worries me.”

 

0

 

Once they arrived in the city, Major Lorne had orders to immediately shuffle them to the conference room, where they were met by Elizabeth, Carson, and John’s team.

“General O’Neill, Colonel Mitchell, we weren’t expecting you,” Elizabeth greeted in surprise.

Jack waved his hand nonchalantly. “Figured you could use the help. And Mitchell here knew Sheppard back when they were spry young lieutenants.” Ignoring the slightly affronted look Cam sent him, Jack shrugged, “Besides… I have to make sure you don’t try to steal Daniel.” He smiled as the archaeologist rolled his eyes.

Though the other Atlantis personnel were a mixture of puzzled and amused, or annoyed in Rodney’s case, Elizabeth smiled politely. “Yes…” she began diplomatically, causing both Daniel and Cam to straighten. “While we requested Dr. Jackson’s assistance with the information on the planet in the Ancients’ database, we weren’t expecting him to come in person.”

“That’s not why I came.” Daniel spoke casually, but the blunt nature turned all the Atlantis personnel’s eyes onto him.

Rodney opened his mouth, but Elizabeth cut in smoothly. “Why don’t we all have a seat, and we can go over everything.”

There were slow, and some reluctant, nods all around.

As they took their seats, Jack placed a hand on Daniel’s shoulder and whispered a gentle reminder. “Easy…”

Daniel threw him a sideways look, but didn’t comment.

After everyone was seated, Elizabeth gave Carson a look, and he cleared his throat before meeting Daniel’s eyes. “Dr. Jackson… though I think it’s admirable you came to help, I honestly think your presence would do more harm than good.”

Ignoring Elizabeth’s nod of agreement, Daniel looked at Carson and asked, “And why is that Dr. Beckett?”

No one else in the room seemed to read the danger behind Daniel’s words, with the possible exception of Teyla and Ronon who had both narrowed their eyes as they watched the archaeologist. However, Jack and Cam, both of whom had worked with Daniel long enough, knew that tone. And while Cam was fighting the urge to bang his head on the table, Jack’s face was crinkled in amusement in this particular situation.

“Daniel…” Elizabeth, ever the diplomat, leaned forward and donned a polite expression. “Right now, we can’t be sure that this really is Colonel Sheppard. If it is, then he seems to be under some kind of mind-altering influence. Whatever the case, he somehow seems to know you. We don’t know what would happen, or what kind of danger you would be in, if he was to see you.”

Jack leaned back in his chair as Daniel rubbed his forehead. Cam’s eyes were darting between his teammate and the Atlantis personnel.

“If I’m not mistaken, isn’t it kinda the point for someone with amnesia to regain their memories?” Daniel sounded tired and a little snappish.

“Yes,” Carson agreed before anyone else could speak. “Howe—”

“But this might not even _be_ Colonel Sheppard! So why would we tell him everything about _our_ Sheppard? He could be some alternate, evil version for all we know!” Rodney snapped, earning scowls from everyone.

Glancing between the Atlantis personnel with narrowed eyes, Daniel grit his teeth, inwardly sighing. “Where is he?” His voice was hard and demanding, and shocked everyone except Jack and Cam.

“He’s in one of the isolation rooms,” Major Lorne informed them before anyone else could speak.

Jack gave the major a nod of gratitude; he’d seen Elizabeth solidifying her diplomatic pose too. Putting a hand on Daniel’s arm to keep the archaeologist from losing his temper, the general sent a questioning look to both the expedition leader and Chief Medical Officer. “I was told that, other than a bump on his head, a mild concussion, and the obvious memory loss, Colonel Sheppard was fine. Care to explain what part of that warrants an isolation room, with guards outside the door I’m presuming?”

Lorne nodded in answer to the second part.

“You’re suggesting we just let some unknown _thing_ in Sheppard’s body roam around the city?! With Sheppard’s gene, do you know what kind of havoc that could reek?!” Rodney retorted scathingly.

Rolling his eyes at his colleague, Carson took a more professional approach when he explained, “General, the fact o’ the matter is that we don’t know what kind of alien influence the colonel is under, nor how it happened. Somehow it’s gone undetected by every test we’ve run.”

“Have you considered that maybe he’s _not_ under alien influence?” Cam drawled. His sarcasm was strong, and had Jack pointing in agreement.

Elizabeth smiled politely, but the sympathy was clear. “Colonel Mitchell, we _all_ want Colonel Sheppard back. Unfortunately, he’s _not_ Colonel Sheppard right now. We have to think about the safety of everyone in the city.”

“We’re doing everything we can to get to the bottom of this,” Carson assured them. “Unfortunately, John has stopped answering our questions, so it’s hard to determine what’s going on since the scans and blood work keep coming back clean. When he first woke up, he was responsive and cooperative. Now… He’s not talking, not eating, and barely submits to the tests.”

“Well, what did you expect?!” Daniel finally snapped, letting his temper loose, glaring at all of the Atlantis personnel. “He woke up with no memory of his adult life, and instead of trying to help him you’re all treating him like a prisoner! Why the hell would he cooperate? Have you _met_ John?”

Jack’s cough covered up his chuckle, while Cam was biting his lip to fight his grin. Lorne, Teyla, and Ronon all looked like they silently agreed with the archaeologist. Rodney rolled his eyes, and Carson appeared both sympathetic and chastised.

Elizabeth was the one who, while maintaining her politeness, spoke firmly. “Dr. Jackson… I understand you want to help. I welcome your help in finding out what happened to John. But right now, he is not the John Sheppard you know. He thinks you’re his brother. We don’t know what else he might believe, and he’s not telling us. At this time, we don’t know if he poses a danger to the city and its occupants, so we have to act accordingly.”

Standing deliberately, Daniel’s expression was hard and his voice unwavering. “From everything you’ve told us, there is nothing wrong with John except amnesia.” Shaking his head, he glanced at Jack before scowling at the Atlantis personnel. “I _am_ his brother. And apparently, I’m the only one he remembers right now, so if you’ll excuse me…”

Stunned silence followed the archaeologist out the door.

Cam looked at Jack, who nodded permission, before following his teammate.

“I’ll let the guards know.” Lorne nodded to O’Neill before leaving as well, ignoring the others.

No one spoke for a few long moments. Jack simply watched them as they shared shocked looks, and waited.

Predictably, it was Rodney who broke the silence. “He’s kidding, right?”


	3. Chapter 2

Chapter 2 - We’re Brothers

 

John was sitting on the floor near the far corner of the room, knees drawn up to his chest and staring at the opposite wall, when Daniel walked in. He met the archaeologist’s eyes for what seemed like an eternity, but was really only a second, before returning his gaze to the wall, and hunching in on himself more.

Daniel recognized the guarded position. It reminded him of the John he’d met all those years ago, especially with the way John’s eyes had screamed at him. Taking a deep breath, he slowly made his way over and sat down next to John, matching his posture.

Neither man spoke for a few minutes.

Realizing the situation they had found themselves in, Daniel swallowed guiltily. He hadn’t seen or talked to John since the mess with the Replicators and the expedition’s return to Atlantis. Jack had been the one to fill him in on everything, and reassure him that Landry was not getting his way, and John wasn’t going to be court-martialed, again — Jack had told Daniel it’d be kind of hypocritical of him to punish John for doing the same thing he’d have done if he’d been in John’s position. Looking at John now, Daniel wished he’d actually sent the email he kept meaning to write, but he’d kept getting distracted — or kidnapped — by the Ori.

“Ya know,” Daniel finally started quietly. “I tried to find you. Later. But they never told me your real name.” The way John stilled imperceptibly told Daniel he had his attention. The corner of his mouth turned up sadly. “When I got back that day and you were gone… They told me they’d found out who you really were; that you’d run away, but they’d found your family, and Mrs. Jenkins had taken you home.”

“No she didn’t.”

Daniel glanced over at John, but John wasn’t looking at him. He was staring at his hands.

“The cops took me back. Not Mrs. Jenkins.” He sighed heavily, and finally turned his head toward Daniel. “I wanted to stay.” The gut wrenching admission was followed by a humorless chuckle, and he leaned his head back against the wall. “But even if I couldn’t, I didn’t wanna go back.” John shrugged, but didn’t say anything else.

He didn’t have to. Daniel filled in the blanks. He could hear it in John’s voice. Watching him for a minute, Daniel smirked, and asked lightly, “You know what my first thought was after we met again in Antarctica and I realized who you were?”

John didn’t reply, but his eyebrows raised fractionally.

“I thought ‘Huh. His name really is John.’”

He didn’t laugh, but the wide smirk that lit up John’s face said it all. “I _did_ tell you…”

Daniel chuckled. “Yes. Yes, you did.”

Turning somber once more, John had ducked his head as he muttered, “I’m sorry. For dragging you into all this.”

Grabbing John’s arm, Daniel waited until John met his eyes, however reluctantly, before he spoke firmly. “John, listen to me… This is not your fault. And we’re gonna get your memory back.”

John opened his mouth, but Daniel cut him off with a look.

“I would’ve been here whether you’d said anything or not.” Seeing John’s furrowed brows, Daniel explained, “Jack — General O’Neill — put me as your next of kin for exactly this type of situation. So I’d know if something happened to you. Just like he’d make sure you knew if anything happened to me.”

It was a minute before John replied. But he hadn’t looked away from Daniel. The archaeologist saw the moment his facade crumbled. “Danny… The last thing I remember clearly is being at Stanford. And obviously I’m not in college anymore.” He’d tried to play it off as self-deprecating, but Daniel heard the fear behind the helpless way John had said his name.

Remaining calm and steady, Daniel nodded slowly. “Ok… That’s a start. It means you know who you are, and you remember at least half of your life. Some people who wake up with amnesia can’t even remember their name, or anything about themselves.” He was still holding onto John’s arm, and could feel his reassurance working as the younger man’s taut muscles began to relax fractionally. “You said ‘clearly’. Do you remember anything else?”

The archaeologist wasn’t pushing, and his supportive presence was having a calming effect on John. The way he spoke said volumes about how grateful he was to have someone on his side. “Just flashes. Bits and pieces that don’t make any sense.” He shook his head, and used the hand on his free arm to rub his forehead as he closed his eyes and scrunched up his face.

“Hey.” Daniel gave the arm in his grip a small shake. When John hesitantly met his eyes, Daniel smiled. “That means it’s coming back. It’s just gonna take time.”

John held his gaze for a long moment, his eyes searching. Satisfied with what he saw in the other man’s eyes, he gave a jerky nod.

Giving a nod of his own, Daniel released his hold and made his way to his feet. Looking down at John, he offered a hand. “Come on. Let’s see if we can’t jog some more memories.”

Furrowing his brows, John accepted the hand, asking, “How?” as he stood.

“I know you don’t keep a lot of personal items, but you have lived in this city for most of the past three years.” Daniel shrugged. “Sometimes just being in familiar places can help you remember.” Frowning when he saw John look down and shuffle his feet, Daniel asked, “What’s wrong?”

Rubbing the back of his neck, John glanced up at him and shrugged. “I don’t think I’m allowed to go anywhere.”

Daniel rolled his eyes, setting his jaw as he held back verbalizing the thoughts that were apparently written on his face, as John raised his eyebrows. “I don’t care. Come on.”

This time, John didn’t argue.

When they exited the isolation room, the guards that had wisely not tried to prevent Daniel’s entrance were gone. Though Daniel caught the flash of confusion when John narrowed his eyes at their absence, neither man commented, and John just followed Daniel’s lead.

They didn’t run into anyone else until they reached the second corridor. At first, John tensed, but he forced himself to loosen his stance when Daniel practically sagged in relief upon recognizing the man.

“Hey guys.” Cam’s smile and easy drawl had a relaxing effect on John as well.

Giving him a nod, Daniel glanced at John. “This is Lieutenant Colonel Mitchell. Cam and I work together. He offered to come with since, other than me, he’s the only one in the program who knew you before you got read in in Antarctica.”

Grinning, Cam held out his hand. “We met all the way back in flight school.”

John shook the offered hand, nodding slowly. Narrowing his eyes, John tilted his head. “Shaft.”

Cam chuckled. “That’s right.” Shooting Daniel a smirk, he told his teammate, “See.”

Daniel barely managed not to roll his eyes at his team leader. Instead, he asked a question. “So, what’s up?”

“General O’Neill was still in the conference room last I checked. But I did run into Major Lorne, and he said to let you guys know that if you need anything, just ask.” Turning to John, Cam smirked. “He also asked me to tell Sheppard he’ll take care of everything until you’re back on duty, but that, while he doesn’t mind helping with your paperwork, he does _not_ want your job so ‘please hurry back’.” His amusement was almost tangible.

John chuckled. “I like him.”

Smiling, Daniel nodded. “Lorne’s a good guy. In one of your emails, you told me to thank Jack for recommending him.”

“Jack?” John’s brows were furrowed.

“General O’Neill.”

“Ah…” Nodding slowly, John’s eyes darted between the other two men. “So… You guys are supposed to help me remember everything?”

“That’s mostly Jackson’s thing.” Cam shrugged and grinned. “I’m just a friendly face. And moral support.”

Raising his eyebrows, John’s mouth was twitching in amusement while Daniel rolled his eyes.

“Yes, thank you Colonel Helpful.”

Cam smirked at his teammate. “Anytime.” Looking at his watch, he added, “Well, I better get going. Lorne said Ronon is training some of the marines in about ten minutes, and I wanted to watch.” Turning serious, he met both of their eyes. “Let me know if you need anything.”

The corner of John’s mouth quirked upward.

Daniel gave a small sigh. “Thanks Mitchell.” His appreciation did not go unnoticed.

Cam grinned and slapped him on the shoulder in return before nodding at John. “See ya around Sheppard.”

John waved as he and Daniel watched the colonel continue on around the corner. Once he was out of sight, he smirked at Daniel. “He’s like a big puppy, isn’t he?”

Daniel dropped his head into his hand. “Oh god yes.”

John chuckled at the dramatics.

Looking back up and shaking his head, Daniel said, “Come on. Transporter is just down the hall.”

By the time they reached John’s quarters, Daniel could see the questions piling up in John’s brain etched into the younger man’s expression.

John’s face was scrunched up as he looked around the room, picking up odds and ends he narrowed his eyes at.

“Anything?” Daniel asked lightly. He wasn’t pushing, and he knew John didn’t take it as such.

“It… _feels_ familiar, but —” John shook his head, rubbing his forehead.

Daniel knew he was trying to remember, but was getting increasingly frustrated because he couldn’t quite get there — like a word on the tip of your tongue but you just can’t think of it. So, Daniel had them sit down, and he explained the Stargate Program, Atlantis, and how John had gotten involved — how they’d met up again after all those years.

“So…I’ve got some mutant gene?” John’s skepticism was clear, but Daniel kept his patience.

“It’s not mutant…sort of. Look, it basically just means you can use the Ancients’ technology. In fact, you seem to have a natural aptitude for it. It comes easy to you. And your gene is stronger than anyone’s, even Jack’s — who had the strongest we knew about until you.”

Daniel’s words had a calming effect on the anxiety he’d noticed beginning to rise in John.

“Look, just try it,” Daniel suggested. Glancing around, his eyes landed on the door, and he looked back at John and said, “Ok, just think about opening the door.”

“What?” John asked shortly, but at the same time, the door swooshed open, revealing a general with an airy expression that might’ve been classified as surprised on anyone else.

“Was that me or you?” was all Jack said as he entered the room.

“Me. Apparently,” John muttered, looking back at Daniel who smiled.

“See. Told you.”

“How is that _not_ mutant?” John retorted.

Daniel rolled his eyes, but Jack smirked. “Whatever it is, it’s cool,” the general shrugged.

John looked back at the older man, his brows furrowing as if he was trying to figure out how he knew him.

Seeing this, Daniel introduced his friend. “This is Jack — General O’Neill.”

“I’d say ‘nice to meet you’, but I’m guessing we’ve already met,” John said to the general, managing to look both apologetic and frustrated at the same time.

Jack waved him off. “Don’t worry about it. When Daniel got amnesia, he showed up on some random planet stark naked. Didn’t even know his name or where he was from.”

“Jack!” Daniel was glaring at him, studiously ignoring John’s raised eyebrows and curious expression.

“Do I know this story?” he asked with a smirk.

Daniel huffed out a long breath, dropping his head.

Jack grinned, and told John, “I’ll tell ya later.”

Shaking his head, Daniel ignored their amusement and looked up at the general. “Was there something you needed Jack?” he asked pointedly, trying to change the topic away from his own embarrassing moments.

Shooting a smirk at his friend, Jack nodded and turned serious when he looked back at John and pulled out a flash drive. “Thought you might wanna take a look at this.”

John took the drive slowly, giving it a cautious look, before sending the older man a questioning glance. “What is it?”

“ _That_ is your entire military record,” Jack answered frankly. “From the time you signed up until now. Unredacted.”

John raised his eyebrows at the last bit of information, but Jack didn’t elaborate further.

Shrugging, the general added, “I know not everything makes it into reports, but I figured it might help jog some memories.”

Swallowing, John’s eyes turned back to the flash drive. He appeared even more wary of it now, and the other two didn’t miss the way he hunched in on himself more. “Thanks,” he mumbled.

Sharing a look with Daniel, Jack cleared his throat. His voice and tone were gentle and reassuring when he said, “You guys let me know if you need anything.”

John nodded slowly, but didn’t look up.

Daniel gave his friend a grateful look, and replied sincerely, “Thanks Jack.”

Nodding, the general shared one more look with the archaeologist before leaving.

The room was silent for a couple minutes, before John finally broke it, in a voice that was so quiet Daniel almost didn’t hear.

“Do I wanna know what’s on here?”

Sighing, Daniel’s face scrunched up in consternation. But he answered honestly. “Probably not everything.” He saw John nodding to himself, and said firmly, “But that’s a large portion of your life. It’s part of who you are. Whether you want to know or not…You _need_ to know.”

When John met his eyes, Daniel was immediately reminded of right after they’d first met, and Diana had tried getting John to open up and tell them what had happened, where he was from. It was fear. Fear of the truth.

John looked away quickly — seemingly realizing what Daniel had seen. “Do you mind if — You know?”

Daniel did know. He nodded. “Sure.” Watching John for another moment, he sighed and stood up. “I’ll get us something to eat while you take a look at that.”

“I’m not really hungry,” John tried to argue.

“Oh, it wasn’t a question,” Daniel shot back easily.

So, after he made sure John could get on the computer and access the files, Daniel headed to the mess hall to get them some food.

He was halfway there when someone stopped him.

“Dr. Jackson.”

Daniel held in his sigh as he turned to greet the woman. “Dr. Heightmeyer.”

The smile she gave him told him she knew his was fake. “I was hoping we could talk for a few minutes.”

“About what?” he asked innocently, but again she gave him a knowing smile.

“About Colonel Sheppard,” she answered anyway. “I apologize for not being in the meeting when you arrived. I had a prior appointment, and at the time, the assumption was that Colonel Sheppard was not really Colonel Sheppard, so my services were only minimally required. However, now —”

“Now that you know he was telling the truth, you want to help figure out what’s going on and help him get his memories back,” Daniel finished for her.

The psychologist nodded. “That’s correct.”

Daniel sighed, rubbing his forehead. “Doctor, you’ve known John for three years.” He looked her in the eye when he asked, “Do you really think he’s gonna talk to you, especially in this situation?”

This time, her smile was amused as well as knowing. “That’s where I was hoping you could help me, Dr. Jackson.” When Daniel raised his eyebrows, Kate elaborated, “John remembers you. He trusts you. And with your relationship, you’re the one who knows the most about him.”

Letting out a long breath, Daniel closed his eyes for a second before returning his gaze to the doctor. “Kate — can I call you Kate?”

“Of course,” she encouraged.

“Kate,” Daniel sighed. “Until Jack dragged him down into the Antarctic base three years ago, I hadn’t seen or heard from John in over twenty years.”

There was that knowing smile again, but now it held sympathy as well. “Daniel — can I call you Daniel?”

Daniel couldn’t help but smirk at the way she was repeating his words, but nodded in reply.

“Daniel, I have read both yours and John’s backgrounds.” Kate gave him a steady look as she informed him, “I know what you both went through. Though, I will admit that until you showed up and confirmed John was your brother, I didn’t make the connection between you.”

“And now that you have?” Daniel prompted, knowing she was going somewhere with this, but not quite sure he wanted to know where.

Kate sighed heavily. “You’re right. I don’t think John will talk to me. In fact, I think — like the treatment he experienced before you arrived — that it might do more harm than good in this situation.” Daniel nodded his agreement before Kate added, “But… I do think he will talk to you.”

Taking a deep breath, Daniel rubbed his forehead again. “And you want me to keep you updated?” he guessed with a sigh.

The smile she gave him now was gentle. “I would appreciate it, yes,” she agreed, but then assured him, “But I don’t expect you to divulge details. I’d just like to know that he’s doing okay.” When the archeologist gave her a calculating look, she smirked. “I can work on getting details after his memory has returned and he’s back on duty.”

Daniel couldn’t help it. He chuckled. “Yeah. You fit right in here.”

Kate smiled. “I’ll take that as a compliment.”

“It is,” Daniel agreed. “John said you’re good. And that means a lot.”

There was that knowing smile again. “Yes, it does.”

 

0

 

John had barely touched the food Daniel brought back for him. His attention had been solely focused on the files he was reading.

Daniel didn’t try talking. Despite Kate’s belief that John would talk to him — a belief he couldn’t really refute — Daniel knew John needed time to process. John wouldn’t talk unless he wanted to talk, and trying to force him to do so would only prolong his silence. Daniel had watched it happen when they were kids, and while John seemed to have picked up the habit of talking circles around people without ever actually saying anything of value, he still valued the silence. Besides, right now, he wasn’t the current John Sheppard. Right now, he was trying to piece together half his life.

When John finally closed the laptop, he took a deep breath and dropped his head into his hands as he leaned on the desk.

Daniel waited patiently until John turned to look at him. He barely managed to maintain a neutral expression when he saw the turmoil in the younger man’s eyes; eyes that were begging him to make sense of it all, something the archaeologist couldn’t do for him, no matter how much he wished he could. He remembered how hard it had been for him when he had returned to human form after his ascension, and how hard it had been to not have all of his memories.

“There any booze in this city?” John’s tone was light, but his voice still cracked.

Not commenting on John’s — poor — attempt to hide his distress, Daniel simply nodded toward the mini fridge.

John opened it, and found the beer. He shrugged one shoulder, muttering, “It’ll do.” Pulling one out, he glanced back and held it up in question.

Daniel nodded, and John handed him the beer before pulling out another for himself.

They sat there for a few minutes in silence once again, each just sipping their beers — or practically chugging, in John’s case.

Once his can was empty, John sighed heavily, staring hard at the can as he traced the lettering with his fingers.

Daniel watched him closely, knowing he wanted to ask something. When John finally looked up, Daniel had a feeling he knew what the question would be. And he was right.

“Why are you here?” He tried to play it off as nonchalant, but the archaeologist knew him too well.

“You know why.” Daniel’s voice was quiet, but firm.

John wasn’t easily deterred though. “We barely know each other. Hell, until a few years ago, we hadn’t even seen each other for over twenty years. You don’t —” He paused and looked away. When he turned back, he kept his eyes down and focused on the empty beer can. “You don’t know.” He didn’t elaborate further, but he didn’t have to.

“I don’t need to,” Daniel told him firmly. When John looked up and opened his mouth to argue, Daniel cut him off sharply. “No, I don’t know everything you’ve been through, or what you’ve done. But I know enough. And I know _you_.” John still looked like he wanted to argue, but Daniel’s expression kept him from doing so. “Regardless of how long it’s been, or how much we both suck at the whole communication thing… We’re brothers.” When John averted his eyes, Daniel sighed heavily, taking off his glasses and rubbing his forehead with the back of his hand. “John… Look… I know I’m terrible at this stuff, but I meant what I said back then. And I mean it now.” Waiting until John met his eyes, Daniel said emphatically, “We’re brothers. Nothing changes that.”

The younger man’s attention was back on the empty beer can in his hands, and he was looking down enough that Daniel couldn’t see his expression. But, despite the shyness trying to creep into his voice, he spoke clearly enough that the archaeologist didn’t have to strain to hear him. “You’re not terrible at it.” John glanced up and met Daniel’s raised eyebrows with a small smirk. “I always thought you were pretty good at it… Still are.”

Daniel smiled, chuckling lightly. “That’s the same thing you said when I asked you to be careful before you came out here the first time.”

John’s smirk turned to a reserved smile. “I know.”

Raising his eyebrows, Daniel’s smile slowly widened. “See. It’s coming back.” He kept his voice optimistic and reassuring, but John’s eyes turned downward again.

“Part of me wishes it wouldn’t,” he admitted so quietly that his voice was barely audible.

Daniel sighed heavily. Nodding, he replied softly, “I know.”


	4. Chapter 3

Chapter 3 - Brothers Not By Blood

 

When Daniel turned the corner after leaving John’s quarters to head to his own guest quarters for the night, he pulled up short, seeing Ronon — arms crossed and staring hard — blocking his path. “Hi,” Daniel greeted slowly. “Ronon, right?”

“So, you’re Sheppard’s brother?” the former Runner asked bluntly.

Daniel let out a small sigh, but nodded. “That’s right.”

“Why’s everybody freakin’ out over it?”

The urge to laugh was strong. Daniel thought it was amusing — and very John — that the pilot had put this man on his team. He hadn’t had much interaction with Ronon the last time he was here, but he knew he was a man of action rather than words. Yet, here he was, bluntly starting a conversation everyone else was too polite to have, despite their intense curiosity. He got straight to the point, and Daniel respected that. Though Daniel also suspected part of the reason Ronon was confronting him was more out of loyalty to John.

Smiling, Daniel told him, “Because, other than General O’Neill, no one knew.”

“Why not?” Again, Ronon got straight to the point.

Taking a deep breath, Daniel admitted, “It’s kinda complicated.” When Ronon narrowed his eyes, the archaeologist added, “If you really wanna know, I’d suggest you ask John.”

Ronon nodded, seemingly understanding what Daniel was trying to say — that it wasn’t his place to disclose that information.

“But yes, I am his brother.” Daniel met the former Runner’s eyes as he said it, and when Ronon nodded again, uncrossing his arms, Daniel knew they were on the same page; they both wanted to help John. Then a thought hit Daniel. “Actually,” he started, holding up a finger, and causing Ronon to furrow his brows at the distracted man. “You might be able to help me.”

Ronon raised his eyebrows, but followed the archaeologist nonetheless.

When they reached Daniel’s guest quarters, Ronon watched in half amusement, half concern as the archaeologist dug through his bag for a notebook, seemingly unaware that he’d had Ronon come with him.

As the other man began flipping through his notebook with brows furrowed in a level of concentration Ronon hadn’t seen on any of the other scientists — McKay was too loud and high-strung — Ronon asked, “How can I help?”

Daniel looked up at him and blinked — like it was taking him a moment to process what he’d been asked, or even that the other man was there. After a moment, he took a deep breath and nodded, motioning for Ronon to come closer. “I looked at the information on the planet and the readings Rodney took. While I don’t think the statue _caused_ John’s memory loss, I do think it may have played a part. I was hoping you could help fill me in on exactly what happened.”

 

0

 

“Daniel,” Jack drawled with as much patience as he could muster when he opened his door to find the practically vibrating archaeologist who’d woken him up. “You _do_ know what time it is, _right_?” he half sighed, half snapped as he rubbed a hand over his face.

“I think I know why John lost his memory,” Daniel said without preamble, ignoring his friend’s grumpiness.

The general stared at the other man for a long moment, before letting out a heavy sigh and waving him in. “Let’s hear it.”

 

0

 

“So… You think this statue — that’s Ancient, or whatever — caused my amnesia?” John’s voice held a healthy dose of skepticism.

“Not exactly,” Daniel corrected, holding up a finger. “I think it did _something_ , and then when you got hit on the head, _that_ caused the amnesia. Not just one thing, but multiple contributing factors, that — by themselves — wouldn’t have caused you to lose your memory.”

John just stared at him for a minute. Then looked over at Jack and Cam. “Do you guys understand what he’s saying?”

“Nope,” Cam answered easily, mumbling around the bite of eggs in his mouth.

“Sheppard, I don’t wanna hear it,” Jack groused. “You get to listen to him ramble _after_ you’ve had coffee.”

“You had coffee,” Daniel argued.

“It hadn’t kicked in yet,” Jack shot back.

“And now?” Daniel asked pointedly.

Jack shrugged, taking another sip of his current cup of coffee. “I still have no idea what you’re talking about, but I don’t wanna kill you as bad now.”

John and Cam purposefully avoided each other’s eyes, as they were both barely managing not to laugh, and weren’t completely successful at keeping their expressions neutral — if the general’s glare was anything to go by.

Taking a drink of his own coffee, John regained his composure, and looked back at Daniel with furrowed brows. “Ok, so if this statue thing or whatever is part of what caused my amnesia… How does that help me remember everything?”

“Would there be a way to reverse whatever effect it had?” Cam wondered.

Daniel sighed heavily, and gave John an apologetic look. “I’m not sure. I don’t know that knowing _how_ you lost your memory will help you get it back,” he told him honestly. “I’m not even really sure what the statue did. I’m going off the information in the Ancients’ database — which isn’t a lot — and Ronon’s account of what happened during the mission. It sounds like your gene — possibly inadvertently — activated the statue, and there was some kind of feedback. Ronon said it seemed like your head was bothering you _before_ you got hit.”

John glared at the big man sitting at the end of the table.

The former Runner shrugged. “You seemed off. And you kept rubbing your head.” He was completely nonchalant, and unfazed by John’s glare.

“But you don’t tell him that,” John retorted, waving a hand at Daniel, who rolled his eyes.

Cam shared a smirk with Jack. John claimed to still not remember his team, but Ronon’s presence didn’t make him uneasy; in fact, it seemed to help keep him calm.

Ronon just raised his eyebrows. “Thought he was your brother?”

“Exactly!” John retorted, again waving his hand to punctuate his point.

Cam almost choked on his toast, as he’d just taken a bite when John’s reply caused him to laugh.

Both John and Daniel glared at him, which only made him laugh harder.

Jack rolled his eyes, and told Ronon, “Daniel can be a bit of a mother hen sometimes.”

“Hey!” Daniel turned his glare onto the general.

John just nodded his agreement.

Ronon smirked, and shoveled another bite of food into his mouth.

“Ok, so what _are_ you saying Jackson?” Cam asked after regaining his composure. “You didn’t do all that research, and try explaining it to us for nothing.”

Cam’s knowing look, and his words, had the rest of the men shooting questioning glances at Daniel as well.

Daniel took a deep breath, and met all their eyes before finally settling on Jack’s. “I want to go back to the planet.” The general started to sigh, but the archaeologist continued before he could argue. “I think I can figure out exactly what the statue did, what it’s purpose is. It might not help John get his memories back, but I think it would be helpful to know what effects _are_ from the statue, and if they’re reversible.”

Jack didn’t say anything for a moment, just held Daniel’s gaze. Finally he sighed, rubbing a hand over his face, and took another sip of coffee.

“Worth a shot Sir,” Cam threw in, earning himself a frown from the older man.

“Weir won’t like it,” Ronon added, but Jack’s ‘no kidding’ expression said he already knew that.

John didn’t say anything, but he shared a long look with Daniel, who could see the conflict in the younger man’s eyes. Finally, John shrugged, and said, “I’m in.”

Jack rolled his eyes. “Sheppard, I’m already gonna have to fight Weir for this mission, don’t make me have to fight Beckett too.”

“But if it was my gene that activated the statue in the first place, don’t you kinda need me there?” John pointed out.

Setting his jaw, the general turned to narrow his eyes the smirking archaeologist. “Oh yeah… You two are definitely related,” Jack grumbled.

Cam covered his mouth to hide his grin. Ronon didn’t even try to hide his. John just raised his eyebrows, but there was a smirk tugging at the corner of his mouth.

Rolling his eyes with a sigh, Jack gave in. “Fine. I’ll talk to Weir. Maybe I can get her to deal with Beckett.”

 

0

 

“General, you can’t be serious!”

“Sure I can.” Jack smiled at the incredulous expedition leader. “I just prefer it when I don’t have to be.”

Elizabeth frowned at his attempt at humor.

Jack sighed. “Dr. Weir, listen… Daniel thinks the statue did _something_ , and that he can figure out what. I’m inclined to believe him.” He met her eyes when he added, “I know you want Sheppard back. Now, while this may not get his memories back… it still may help.”

There was a long pause before Elizabeth took a deep breath, and dropped down into her chair. Leaning forward on her desk, she spoke softly, but her worry was clear. “And you think John can handle this?”

The general took a breath as well, and dropped down into one of the chairs in front of her desk. “Elizabeth… Sheppard _wants_ to go, and frankly, I can’t think of a good enough reason to keep him back.” Jack gave her a reassuring smile when he added, “He isn’t going alone. We’ll keep an eye on him.”

Elizabeth looked up and raised an eyebrow at him. “‘We’?” The corners of her eyes crinkled as a smile tugged at her mouth.

Jack shrugged, smirking. “Can’t let the kids have all the fun.”

Shaking her head, the expedition leader sighed. “This is insane,” she mumbled, dropping her head into her hands.

“Oh please. I’ve read the mission reports, I know crazier shit happens around here all the time,” Jack retorted, waving a hand.

Raising an eyebrow as she gave him a hard stare, Elizabeth shot back, “Crazier than finding out my military commander _wasn’t_ possessed by some alien lifeform, and really _is_ the brother of the man that helped start the Stargate Program?”

The general had a light expression when he raised his eyebrows and returned, “You saying space vampires that _actually_ suck the life out of people isn’t as crazy as Daniel and Sheppard being brothers?”

Giving a ‘touché’ nod, Elizabeth shrugged in concession. “Maybe I’m just used to the Wraith.”

Nodding slowly, Jack agreed, “Fair enough.” However, he smirked when he added, “But it _is_ in both of their files.”

Elizabeth narrowed her eyes at the older man. “General, I’ve read John’s file front to back more than once. The only mention of a brother was Dave Sheppard.”

Jack’s smirk widened. “Look closer.”

She furrowed her brows when he didn’t elaborate.

Standing, the general threw in, “And I put Daniel down as Sheppard’s next of kin.” He started walking toward the door, but when he got there, turned and smiled when he asked, “So, I take it the mission is a go?”

The expedition leader just stared at him in astonishment for a long moment, before finally rolling her eyes. Shaking her head, she sighed and gave in. “Yes, you have a go.”

 

0

 

“How is it that you don’t remember us, but you remember how to do that?” Rodney griped, rolling his eyes as he watched John easily gear up and check over his weapons.

“It’s called muscle memory, McKay,” Jack retorted as he finished checking over his own weapons.

Cam and Ronon shared a smirk, while Daniel just rolled his eyes as he finished gearing up as well.

John just shrugged, then smirked when he looked at Rodney and asked, “Didn’t I shoot you?”

Everyone looked at him in surprise.

Then Rodney rolled his eyes. “Of _course_ you remember _that_ ,” he grumbled. Then complained, “And it was more than once!”

John just grinned back.

Jack shook his head. “You had a shield the first time McKay. Doesn’t count.”

“He shot me too, McKay,” Ronon added with a shrug. “Get over it.”

Speaking up over Rodney’s spluttering, Cam announced, “Alright boys — and girl,” he added with a smile to Teyla, who gave him a serene smile and nod back. “Let’s get this show on the road.” He returned Daniel’s nod of gratitude — he’d seen the look in John’s eyes too — before heading out of the locker room.

The others began trickling out as well, until it was just Jack and John left.

The general was purposefully being slow, and not looking directly at the younger man as John checked over all of his gear for the third time. “Something on your mind kid?” Jack asked lightly.

John looked up quickly, eyes widened as if he was a kid who’d gotten caught with his hand in the cookie jar. Swallowing, he shook his head. “No Sir.”

Jack raised his eyebrows. “You good?” He kept his voice light, but the question was serious.

The younger man nodded. “Yes Sir.”

“Then what’s up?” Jack asked bluntly, turning to face the other man.

John froze for a moment, holding the general’s gaze. Whatever he saw must have convinced him to drop the act, and he let out a long breath before looking down. “Just wondering how safe it is for people to be around me, I guess.”

“Hey,” Jack snapped at the mumbled answer, getting the younger man to look up at him. “Those were extenuating circumstances, and you know it. You read the reports.” He spoke firmly, but then added in a softer tone, “McKay can’t keep his mouth shut, but — for all his annoying traits — he just wants his best friend back.” When John raised his eyebrows, Jack shook his head. “Don’t ask me. I don’t get it.” Then he paused, a thoughtful expression passing over his face before he shrugged. “Then again… Daniel somehow ended up being mine, so who knows how it happens.”

The corner of John’s mouth turned upward slightly. “He trusts you.”

“And McKay trusts you,” Jack returned easily. When the beginnings of the smile fell and the younger man’s eyes turned down again, Jack prompted gently, “What is it?”

“He shouldn’t.” John looked up and met the general’s eyes when he elaborated, “They shouldn’t trust me.”

Jack’s voice had a hard edge when he replied, “You earned it.”

John didn’t look a way, and kept his voice steady. “I killed Colonel Sumner.”

He had started to turn away, but Jack grabbed his arm and turned him back so they were face to face. “You did him a favor.” Though he spoke quietly, the general’s tone was both firm and somber. “It was a tough call, and you made it.” Jack gave John credit; even though he swallowed hard, he didn’t look away. “I knew Sumner. He didn’t like you, that’s true. But I guarantee you had his respect for that.”

The two men stared hard at each other for a long moment, before John finally nodded his understanding, and Jack let go of his arm.

“You good?” Jack asked seriously. He didn’t want to take John on the mission — no matter how much they may need him — if he couldn’t get his head in the game. But when John nodded, and said, “I’m good.”, Jack believed him. So, the general nodded, smiled, and said, “Alright. Let’s go.”

By the time they made their way to the gate room, the others were already there, and had just ordered Chuck to start dialing the Gate.

“Good luck,” Elizabeth told them from her perch on the balcony above.

“We’re gonna need it,” Rodney mumbled, causing Teyla to frown at him and everyone else except John to roll their eyes.

“Why’s that McKay?” John drawled.

Rolling his eyes, the scientist retorted, “Oh, please. You’re a trouble magnet.”

Before John’s head had even completely turned toward him, Daniel was already holding up a finger and warning, “Don’t say it.”

Smirking belied the innocent expression John had. “Say what?”

Scowling at him, Daniel opened his mouth, but was cut off by Jack.

“Then let me make some clarifications,” the general started, staring pointedly at the archaeologist. “No dying. No glowing. — ”

“No getting kidnapped,” Cam threw in.

Jack pointed in agreement. “That too.”

Daniel rolled his eyes. But Ronon was smirking, and Teyla had raised her eyebrows as she watched the exchange.

Rodney’s eyes were wide. “Oh god… We’re all gonna die.”

“McKay!” everyone else snapped as the event horizon kawooshed into life.

“Well, it’s true!” Rodney argued. “I hadn’t thought of it before, but we have all of the people with the worst luck in the history of the Stargate Program on this mission! How is that not an omen of death?!”

While John, Ronon, and Teyla had all furrowed their brows in confusion, Jack and Daniel scowled at the scientist.

Cam shrugged. “He’s got a point.” When everyone’s eyes turned to him, he grinned. “But that’s the fun part.”

Daniel rolled his eyes and started toward the Gate, but Jack chuckled.

As the others started following them through the wormhole, John just looked at Cam and smirked.

“What?” Cam shrugged back.

John shook his head and started toward the Gate. “Big puppy,” he muttered.

Cam laughed as he followed. “I’ll take that as a compliment!”

Rodney sighed, looking toward the ceiling. “I’m doomed.” But he followed nonetheless.

 

0

 

Daniel had been studying the statue and its engravings for about an hour. Teyla was politely answering any questions he had, while Rodney was injecting himself into the research and — if Daniel’s face was anything to go by — about to get punched.

No one had missed the tension running through John since they’d arrived on the planet — with the way he kept tightening his grip on his P-90, the set of his jaw, and the way his eyes never stopped scanning his surroundings — but none of them commented on it.

Jack and Cam had started a debate about the upcoming baseball season. They were mostly ignoring — or at least pretending to — the scientists, and John’s pacing.

After a little while, Ronon had fallen into step with John, who — though he gave him a sideways glance — didn’t comment on it.

When their perimeter sweep took them a fair distance away from the others, Ronon finally spoke — though he did keep his voice low to reduce the chances of one of the others overhearing. “So why didn’t anyone know Jackson was your brother?”

John’s eyes shot over to the former Runner so quick the other man raised his eyebrows in surprise. “What are you talking about?” John had tried to keep his voice casual, but Ronon heard the wariness.

Shrugging, he said, “When I asked Jackson, he said it was complicated, and that I should ask you.”

Staring at the other man for a long moment, John finally took a deep breath and returned his eyes to their sweep of the surrounding forest. “Why does it matter?” he retorted.

Again, Ronon shrugged. “Doesn’t. I was just curious why everyone was freaking out about it.”

John shot him a sideways glance, but then chuckled lightly. Shrugging as well, he said, “It’s complicated.”

“Why?”

Sighing at the other man’s persistence, John stared out at the forest for a minute before he replied. Scrunching his face up in indecision, he finally took a deep breath and glanced at Ronon before asking, “On your planet — Sateda, right?” Ronon nodded, and John continued, “What happened to the kids whose parents died or got taken by the Wraith, or whatever?”

Furrowing his brow, the former Runner shrugged. “They got put in a place with other orphaned kids. Or other people took them in.”

Nodding slowly, John swallowed before he spoke again. “It’s pretty much the same on Earth. Kids without parents get put in orphanages, or foster homes — basically, strangers take in these kids with nowhere else to go.”

“Ok,” Ronon nodded. He didn’t continue, just waited for John to.

“Danny — Daniel… His parents died when he was a kid.”

“Yours too?” Ronon asked quietly.

John glanced at him and shrugged. “My mom did.”

Ronon saw the way the other man’s eyes had glazed over slightly. “What about your dad?”

Shaking himself, John looked back out to the forest before taking a deep breath. “We didn’t exactly see eye to eye,” he admitted in a mumble. Shrugging, he tried to project nonchalance as he added, “So… I left.”

Raising his eyebrows, Ronon questioned, “You ran away?”

Furrowing his brows for a second, John looked pensive for a moment before giving a half nod, half shrug. “Yeah. Pretty much.” Shaking his head, he continued, “Anyway, the authorities didn’t know who I was when they found me. I wouldn’t tell them.” He ignored Ronon’s smirk. His own smirked formed when he informed the former Runner, “So, they labeled me a ‘John Doe’ — basically what people on Earth call a guy when they don’t know who he is.”

Ronon grinned as well, recognizing the joke.

John shrugged before he finished, “So, they put me with this couple who took in kids who didn’t have families. But they already had a couple other kids living there too.”

“Jackson?” Ronon guessed.

Nodding, John confirmed, “Yeah. He was the oldest. The other was a two-year old girl.”

The glazed over look returned, but Ronon was patient, and didn’t say anything while he waited for John to start talking again.

“Anyway, the house wasn’t very big. Me and Danny had a bunk bed in this tiny bedroom.” He was shaking his head, but there was a fond smile on his face. But it drained away, replaced by a sorrowful expression as John’s eyes turned down and he finished quietly, “I lived there until after school started up that fall, and one of the teachers wanted me to take the MENSA test. When I passed, it drew attention… Including people who knew my father… Once the authorities figured out who I was… They sent me back to him.”

John didn’t say anything else, and Ronon didn’t push; he’d learned enough. They just continued walking.

They arrived back to the statue to join the others just in time to hear Daniel mutter, “Oh boy…”

Immediately, Jack, Cam, and John’s eyes were on the archaeologist. Even Rodney had paused long enough to snark, “What? What did you do now?”

Teyla and Ronon were both frowning.

When Daniel didn’t say anything else, just double checking something from the statue against his notes, and again muttering, “Oh boy…” then Rodney frowned as well, and actually looked at the other scientist.

“Jackson?” Cam prompted, worry creeping into his voice.

“Daniel!” Jack snapped, getting the man’s attention when nothing else had.

The archaeologist finally looked up at the rest of them and took a deep breath. “I know what happened.”

Time seemed to freeze as everyone stared at him.

“Well? What?!” Jack barked, breaking the silence.

Daniel met and held John’s apprehensive gaze as he explained. “This statue… It’s not just a monument. It’s history.”

Rolling his eyes, Rodney scoffed, “We already knew that! The village whoever told us all this. Ancestor blah blah — blah blah heritage — etc. etc.”

The archaeologist rolled his eyes with his whole body. “Rodney! This isn’t just some statue to remind people of their history! It literally _is_ their history!” Daniel snapped, glaring at the scientist.

Rodney jerked back with wide eyes, but everyone else was looking at Daniel with furrowed brows.

“Jackson… What are you talking about?” Cam questioned evenly.

Heaving a sigh, Daniel turned back to the others. “I mean, I was wrong. The statue _did_ cause John’s amnesia.” He looked at John when he added softly, “You would’ve lost your memory either way. Getting hit on the head just sped up the clock.”

“How so?” Teyla asked calmly. Out of the whole group, she seemed to be the least fazed — or at least was hiding it better.

Daniel took a deep breath before explaining, “It’s used as a way to pass down history.” His face scrunched up in deliberation for a moment before he continued, “Think of it like how the elders of a village tell stories to the children, so they know the history of their people, and the cycle continues so it’s never forgotten.” There were nods all around. “But it’s not always accurate,” Daniel added carefully. “Things get lost over time.”

“Like that game — telephone,” Cam said, causing the others to look at him — those from Earth giving him smirks, while Ronon and Teyla gave him looks of confusion.

However, Daniel nodded. “Exactly!” Looking back at the statue with a frown, he continued, “This was a way to store people’s memories. From the carvings, it seems like when the elders were close to death, they would come and give it their memories.”

“‘Give it their memories’?” Jack repeated skeptically.

Shrugging, Daniel elaborated, “Only those who were deemed worthy.”

“People with the gene,” Rodney guessed, eyes brightening as he realized where Daniel was going with this.

“Yes,” the archaeologist nodded.

“Ok, but if it’s a way to store their history, that means there’s gotta be a way to get the memories out, _right_?” John interjected.

This time, everyone’s eyes were on John.

Daniel let out a long breath, but slowly began to nod. “Yes,” he started hesitantly. “According to these — ” He waved at the carvings on the statue. “Yes. That’s how they choose their elders. Whoever can ‘learn’ their history, can lead.”

At this point, Rodney had already begun double checking Daniel’s work and was nodding and talking to himself. But now, he looked up and smiled. “He’s right. You should just be able to reactivate it, and it will give you back your memories!”

Teyla was giving Rodney a patient look, but Ronon looked at Daniel and asked bluntly, “Will it work?”

Taking off his glasses to rub his face, Daniel sighed. “I don’t know. We don’t know exactly what happened in John’s case. From what I understand, you guys weren’t here long enough for the statue to take all his memories.”

“That’s why he still remembered who he was — just missing a bunch of years?” Cam wondered.

Daniel nodded. “That’s my guess.” Looking back at his notes, he shrugged. “It seems like normally it’s a longer process, and those ‘giving’ their memories stay here until they’ve all been absorbed by the statue.”

“But Sheppard didn’t do that,” Jack pointed out.

Shaking his head, Daniel agreed, “No. And I’m guessing the symptoms Ronon noticed when they were on the way back to the Gate was the statue still trying to take the memories.”

“And then when I got hit on the head, I wasn’t fighting it?” John guessed in a resigned tone.

Looking at John, Daniel smirked — but it had a hint of sadness. “Pretty much. Except they got you back through the Gate before the statue could take them all.”

“Lucky,” Jack commented wryly.

Rodney rolled his eyes. “Right. So, now, get over here, put your hand on the thing, and get your memories back so we can get off this planet before we run into anyone else passing through that wants to bash your head in,” he told John, snapping his fingers impatiently.

The others gave the scientist varying expressions of annoyance and disbelief. But John was ignoring him and looking at Daniel.

“You think this will work?” he asked directly.

Daniel took a deep breath and shrugged. “I think it’s the best option we have,” he answered honestly.

Nodding, John started over to the statue.

“Are we sure about this?” Cam sounded uncertain.

Jack rolled his eyes at the colonel. “Are we ever sure about anything?”

Cam canted his head at the retort. “Touché.”

They all watched with bated breath as John closed his eyes and took a deep breath — reminding Daniel of when he watched John step through the Stargate the first time — before he put his hand in the designated spot Rodney was pointing to on the statue.

 

0

 

The groan from the bed had Daniel looking up from his notebook. He smiled when he saw John opening his eyes. “Hey. You’re awake.”

Blinking slowly as his eyes took in his surroundings, John finally settled his gaze on the archaeologist. “What happened?” He coughed, his voice raspy, and took a drink of the water Daniel handed him. He swallowed, and when he spoke again his voice was clearer. “Thanks.”

Daniel nodded. Then turned sober. “How are you feeling?” he asked gently, not prying, but still requiring an answer.

John furrowed his brows. “Who are you?”

For a moment, Daniel froze. But then he saw the twinkle in John’s eyes and heaved a breath that was some kind of cross between a sigh and a growl. “You little — ” Pausing and rolling his eyes at John — who was now full on smirking — he shook his head and couldn’t stop the smile that escaped. “I’m glad you’re feeling better,” he said seriously.

The smirk turned into a genuine smile when John replied, “I’m glad you wanted to go back to that planet.”

Watching the younger man for a moment, Daniel phrased his question carefully. “Does that mean you remember? Everything?”

There was a quick moment where John averted his eyes, but he returned them to Daniel’s and nodded slowly. “Everything,” he confirmed quietly.

Daniel’s expression was understanding.

Silence took over for a minute, while John readjusted himself so he was sitting up in the bed better and took another few sips of the water.

“Sorry I haven’t been in touch lately,” Daniel told him, his tone dry.

John just looked at him for a moment before smirking. “Well, I was the one who left first.” He shrugged when he added, “Again.”

The archaeologist rolled his eyes at the self-deprecating addition, but replied lightly, “Jack filled me in on what happened with the Replicators.” He shrugged and added, “I meant to send an email.”

“General O’Neill told me you got kidnapped by the Ori… and turned into a Prior.” John shrugged. “It happens.”

Daniel nodded with raised eyebrows. “Yeah…” he muttered. “It does.”

Smirking, John said, “We both suck at this whole communication thing.”

Rolling his eyes at having his words thrown back at him, Daniel shook his head with a small chuckle. But when he looked at John, his eyes were firm and serious. “I hope you remember the rest of that conversation too.”

John nodded, but it was his eyes that said everything. “Always,” he agreed quietly, holding out his hand.

Daniel smiled as he clasped the younger man’s hand. “Always.”

They could hear Rodney down the hall, but it was Ronon who was the first to enter the infirmary. He gave a nod to both men, who nodded back as they released each other’s hand.

Glancing at John, Daniel spoke before the former Runner made his way over. “I’m glad you found another one.” He smiled, then paused and rolled his eyes when they heard Rodney again, and amended reluctantly, “Or two.”

Chuckling, John turned serious when he replied, “Right back at ya.” He smiled when Daniel furrowed his brows, and nodded over the archaeologist’s shoulder.

Following his line of sight, Daniel smiled when he saw Jack and Cam coming in with Elizabeth and Teyla. Turning back to John, they shared a knowing smile, and Daniel commented, “I guess we both got pretty lucky.”

John nodded. “I guess we did,” he agreed.

“Well, are you back?” Rodney demanded when the group reached the bed.

This brought Carson out of his office, barking, “Rodney! Stop harassin’ my patients before I’ve had a chance to exam ‘em.”

But John was looking at Rodney with furrowed brows. “Who are you?”

Rodney started spluttering, but when the others saw Daniel roll his eyes, their reactions varied.

Jack and Ronon chuckled, while Cam smirked, “Told ya!”

Carson and Elizabeth both rolled their eyes.

“John…” Teyla chastised.

John laughed. Grinning, he shrugged. “Sorry. Couldn’t resist.”


	5. Chapter 4

Chapter 4 - Family

 

“John,” Elizabeth smiled when the man entered her office. “How are you feeling?”

“Good,” he replied with a nod. “Doc says everything checks out. I’m back on full duty tomorrow.”

Still smiling, Elizabeth said, “That’s good to hear.”

“I thought so,” he agreed lightly.

The expedition leader shook her head in amusement, but John preempted whatever she was going to say — seeing the look in her eyes — by speaking first.

“So,” he drawled. “You wanted to see me?”

“Just to make sure you’re doing alright,” Elizabeth assured him. Sitting back in her chair, she commented lightly, “I haven’t seen much of you lately.”

Rubbing the back of his neck, John averted his eyes by doing a cursory sweep of the room, and shrugged. “Just recovering,” he responded with a forced smile.

Her expression said she knew he was bullshitting her. But she didn’t call him on it, something he was grateful for. The truth was he had spent most of the last couple days hanging out with Daniel, catching up and avoiding the rest of the expedition. Cam and Jack joined them some as well. Ronon too, though he and Rodney seemed to give John space to spend time with the archaeologist — or at least Ronon understood the need for it and convinced Rodney. John had had to have a conversation with Teyla, basically explaining the situation with him and Daniel as he had done with Ronon; it went better than he was expecting, but mainly because Teyla was Teyla and could read what he didn’t say a majority of the time. Daniel had had a similar conversation with Cam. Even though the other pilot hadn’t pushed for information, both Daniel and John agreed he deserved to know. He took everything in with an ease and understanding that reminded John why they’d become friends back in flight school. Jack had already known, so he had helped run interference with everyone else.

John could tell Elizabeth was more than curious, but it wasn’t really a conversation he wanted to have with her. If Jack hadn’t assured him he’d handle things on Earth, John would be more concerned about that, and potentially losing Atlantis, but he trusted the general — he’d earned it. So, he tried to make a quick and easy escape to avoid the expedition leader’s questions. “Well… If that’s all you needed…” He started to leave when her voice stopped him in his tracks.

“Actually… John… I was hoping we could talk.” Her voice was soft, and cautious, but still left no room for doubt that it was an order.

Taking a deep breath, he closed his eyes for a moment before turning to face his boss with a smile. “About what?”

Raising an eyebrow at him, the corner of Elizabeth’s mouth turned up. “Did you really think we wouldn’t need to have a chat about this?”

“I was hoping,” he admitted in a mumble, shrugging.

She raised both her eyebrows, and he sighed.

Dropping down into the chair in front of her desk, he was resigned when he asked, “Ok, so what do you wanna know?”

Elizabeth leaned forward on her desk, and began calmly. “John… I’ve read your file more than once. Cover to cover. The only mention of a brother was Dave.” When John didn’t speak or react, she sighed, and continued, “General O’Neill told me to look closer.” He still didn’t say anything, and though she adjusted her head in an attempt to get him to look her in the eye, John still would not look at her directly. Elizabeth shrugged. “When I went back over it, I _did_ find where General O’Neill had made Dr. Jackson your next of kin,” she admitted, but then added, “However, I still couldn’t find any other connection.”

John finally took a breath, and met her eyes. “It’s in there,” was all he said.

Narrowing her eyes, Elizabeth asked, “Where?” Turning sympathetic, yet frustrated, she pointed out, “John, your whole life is in that file, and I could find no instance where you and Daniel crossed paths before Antarctica.”

“We were kids,” John shrugged.

Elizabeth opened her mouth — seemingly about to argue more — when she paused, and then frowned. “Are you talking about the time you were missing when you were twelve?”

John shook his head. “I wasn’t missing.” When she looked about to speak, he added, “My dad just didn’t know where I was. But I was fine.”

There was a long moment where the expedition leader just stared at him. When she spoke, it was slowly, and her voice was cautious. “John… What exactly happened? There’s a small part there that’s redacted. The rest just says you were missing, but recovered and returned home to your father. I just assumed the redacted part involved police reports.”

His face held a sardonic half smile. “Partially, yeah,” John admitted. Shrugging, he told her, “The redacted parts contain case numbers. Both police _and_ social services.”

“‘Social services’?” she repeated. Then her face lightened as realization hit. Elizabeth sighed. “You mean foster care. That’s how you met Daniel.”

John nodded. “Yep.” Seeing her run a hand across her mouth in disbelief and sympathy, he rolled his eyes and shrugged. “I left home. When I got picked up, I wouldn’t tell them who I was. So, I was a John Doe. They stuck me in a foster home until they could figure out who I was. Took ‘em a while.”

“And Daniel?” Elizabeth wondered quietly.

“Was in the same foster home,” John confirmed. He smirked when he added, “We shared a bunk bed.”

The smile she tried to produce failed, and Elizabeth sighed, looking down for a moment. “Why… John… Why would you run away?” She looked up at him, shaking her head, baffled.

Rolling his eyes, John stood quickly. “Look, are we done rehashing my childhood now?”

His abrupt change in attitude startled her. Elizabeth’s eyes widened as she leaned back to observe him closer. Then she deflated some when she remembered something. “That was right after your mother died, wasn’t it?” His face hardened, and the expedition leader apologized quickly. “I’m sorry,” Elizabeth told him sincerely, holding up a placating hand. “I shouldn’t have pried.”

John slowly forced his body to relax. He pasted on a fake smile and shrugged. “It’s fine. Can I go now?”

Sighing, Elizabeth nodded. “Sure,” she smiled, even though it wavered slightly.

Nodding, he turned to leave again, but again was stopped by her voice.

“John?” Even with his back to her, she knew he rolled his eyes before he turned back to her with a completely neutral expression. Narrowing her eyes slightly, she asked somberly, “Are we ok?”

A little more of the tension left his body, and his smile became more genuine. “We’re good Elizabeth,” John nodded.

Smiling, she nodded as well. “Good.”

He turned to leave for the third time, but this time he paused on his own. John didn’t turn back, just looked over his shoulder to tell her quietly, “Ya know… Daniel’s my brother… But… You guys… You’re family too.”

John was gone before Elizabeth could even process what he’d said. When she did, she smiled.

 

0

 

Major Lorne was transporting Jack, Cam, and Daniel back to Earth via Midway again. Landry still didn’t trust John in a Puddle Jumper anywhere near Stargate Command — something that amused Jack to no end.

“It was lovely to see you all again. Hopefully next time will be under better circumstances,” Teyla told the three men as they were preparing to leave.

“I wouldn’t hold my breath if I was you,” Jack smirked, but returned Teyla’s Athosian farewell, leaning his forehead down to meet hers, with a genuine smile.

She repeated this gesture with Cam, and again with Daniel, who also gave her a hug and whispered something into her ear that made her smile and bow her head in reply. Teyla ignored both John and Rodney’s questioning looks.

Sharing a nod with Ronon, Jack turned to John and said, “Try to stay out of trouble, Sheppard.” His sarcasm made John grin, and Daniel and Rodney roll their eyes.

“No promises Sir,” John replied with a shrug.

Giving a shrug of his own, Jack waved it away, retorting lightly, “Well, then at least get me out of Washington for a bit. I like the vacation. Just needs more fishing.”

“Talk to Carson,” John suggested. “He likes fishing.”

Jack raised his eyebrows. “Really?” he drawled, intrigued. When John nodded, the general hummed to himself. “Next time,” he stated categorically.

John grinned. “I’ll let him know.”

“You do that.” And with that, Jack turned and headed into the Jumper, saying something to Lorne about letting him drive.

“‘Next time’? Are you insane?” Rodney grumbled, but the others ignored him.

“Take care Sheppard,” Cam said, holding out his hand, and pulling John in for a half hug when the other man grabbled his hand. “Try not to lose your memory,” he added with a smirk and a final slap on the shoulder when he released his fellow lieutenant colonel.

“Try not to lose your pants,” John shot back easily, then grinned. “But then again… Go ahead. Vala and I have a bet on how many times it happens before the end of the year.”

Cutting in before Cam could form a comeback, Daniel held up a finger to John and said firmly, “No, no, no. You and Vala are not allowed to conspire together. I already warned both of you.”

John shrugged, and told Daniel, “I don’t remember that.”

Rolling his eyes, Daniel shot back, “I call bullshit.”

Smirking, John retorted, “Prove it.”

Daniel shook his head, giving up, and pulled John in for a hug. “Stay safe little brother,” he whispered.

“You too big brother,” John whispered back as he returned the hug.

When they released each other, Daniel and Cam said their final goodbyes and turned toward the Jumper. The archaeologist paused, and turned back for a moment.

“Hey John…” Daniel smirked, then teased dryly, “Don’t get amnesia again.”

“Hey Danny… Don’t get kidnapped again,” John returned in the same manner.

They could hear both Cam and Jack chuckling and groaning, respectively, from the inside of the Jumper. Daniel just smiled and waved again before walking in as the ramp closed.

“I like him,” Ronon grunted as they watched the Jumper leave.

John grinned, and while Teyla nodded her agreement with a smile, Rodney rolled his eyes. “Of course you do,” the scientist mumbled. Shaking his head, he griped, “Can we go now? It’s lunch time, and you know how my blood sugar gets.”


	6. Epilogue

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is a flashback to when John and Daniel were kids. (I got their ages from the Stargate Wiki). John is 12, and Daniel is 17.

Epilogue — Always

 

_1982_

 

Daniel was reading as he walked — something Diana continued to warn him against ever since he fell down the stairs not long after he’d moved in when he missed a step because he was distracted. He didn’t have as many accidents now, not since he’d learned the house well enough to know where everything was. This time, he was startled back into reality when he was plunged into darkness after stepping into the bedroom he shared with John.

Furrowing his brows, Daniel flicked on the light and looked around the small room. The sun had just gone down, but the curtains were drawn — which was why it was so dark with the lights off and door shut. He didn’t see the younger boy now though, which caused the teenager to frown. Diana had sent him up to get John after he got back from the library so they could help set everything up for dinner before Paul got home from work, so he knew John was here — or was supposed to be.

“John?” Daniel’s voice wasn’t loud, and there was an uncertainty to his tone.

When he didn’t get a reply, he moved further into the room, shutting the door behind him. Once he’d gotten inside a few more steps, Daniel sighed.

Nestled in between the dresser and desk — where you wouldn’t see him from the doorway — was John. He was sitting on the floor, with his back against the wall and his knees pulled up to his chest. His eyes were fixed on a spot in the carpet.

But Daniel knew the younger boy was aware of his presence; he’d seen him hunch in on himself more. Taking a deep breath, the teenager bit his lip unsurely before setting his book on top of the dresser and squeezing himself into the small space next to John on the floor, matching the younger boy’s posture.

“Cozy,” Daniel commented wryly.

John didn’t say anything, but Daniel could feel the tension running through him.

“Any particular reason we’re sitting on the floor?” Daniel asked lightly.

The younger boy’s shoulder’s moved up and down quickly in a shrug.

Nodding slowly, Daniel’s voice was nonchalant. “You know it’s almost dinnertime?”

Daniel heard John swallow before the boy nodded.

“So…” The teenager trailed off, not knowing what to say next.

Because they were squished together between the two pieces of furniture, Daniel could feel John’s squirming, even though he was trying to hide it.

“Did something happen today while I was gone?” Daniel asked quietly, his voice barely audible.

But his words froze John. Immediately, alarm bells started going off in Daniel’s head. They calmed when he realized that Diana would have warned him if it was something serious. She had given him a heads up the day he got back and had a new roommate — a John Doe they knew nothing about.

Even after almost two months, John still didn’t talk much, didn’t offer up any information about his past or who he was, but he had started to relax more, even have fun — especially a couple weeks ago when Paul and Diana took them to the fair, where John fell in love with the ferris wheel. He was still shy around Diana, still timid around Paul, but he was good with Kelly — would play with her — and had even started to have conversations with Daniel — mostly about books, which was why Daniel had helped him talk to Diana and convince her to let John get his own library card, so he could go with Daniel sometimes and check out his own books.

Right now, though, Daniel was reminded of the boy who couldn’t sleep and barely spoke when he first arrived — and closed off even more when Diana tried to get him to talk. This wasn’t the smiling kid watching cartoons with Kelly when Daniel left this morning.

“Mrs. Jenkins came by.”

The softly spoken words got Daniel’s attention, and he turned his head to look at the younger boy, who was now staring at his hands. But he didn’t say anything; he’d learned sometimes it was best to just let John process things at his own pace.

“To talk to Diana about school.” John’s voice was a whisper, but Daniel still heard the anxious tremor.

The teenager let out a long sigh. He’d known school was starting soon, but he hadn’t thought about what that would mean for John. It had been hard enough getting the younger boy the library card, and Daniel knew that process was nothing compared to getting registered at a new school — he’d had his own issues with it after moving in with Paul and Diana, and he had all, or most, of his records.

John didn’t say anything else. He didn’t have to. Daniel knew both Mrs. Jenkins and Diana had tried to get him to open up again. Which explained why the younger boy was hiding out in their bedroom.

“They gonna let you pick a new name?”

His lame attempt at lightening the mood got John to finally look over at him. Daniel sighed when John’s eyes were screaming at him, but despite that, he could feel the younger boy’s taut muscles relaxing somewhat.

“I’ll take that as a no?” Daniel drawled.

John’s mouth twitched, one corner beginning to tug upward. “My name _is_ John.”

Daniel rolled his eyes. “Fine. Don’t tell me.”

Now, John was starting to smirk.

Nudging the younger boy, Daniel told him seriously, “You’ll be fine.”

Turning his head back to look at the carpet, John nodded slowly. “Yeah…”

“Hey.” The teenager nudged him again, getting John to meet his eyes again. “The high school is right next door.”

“So?” John shrugged.

Rolling his eyes, Daniel shrugged back. “ _So_ … I’ll be next door.” When John furrowed his brows, Daniel was the one who looked away this time, but only for a moment. “Look… New schools are hard… But… If you need…” He shifted uncomfortably, but finished with a steady voice. “Anything… I’m there.” Daniel shrugged again, trying not to fidget under the younger boy’s intense scrutiny.

“Why?” Though his gaze was intense, John’s voice just sounded confused.

Daniel opened his mouth, but the paused, and took a deep breath, scrunching his face up in consternation as he chose his words carefully. “Because…” he finally started simply. “We’re brothers.”

Raising his eyebrows — to the point they were almost hidden by the unruly mop of hair Diana was itching to trim up — was the only outward reaction John had. Though Daniel did feel him tense up again.

Sighing, Daniel turned his own gaze across the short distance to the bunk bed they shared on the opposite wall — where John had hung pictures of airplanes and helicopters and Daniel had hung notes he’d copied down from books at the library. “Look… Things could change anytime… I’ve been in plenty of different places, with different people, since my parents died… But…” He took a deep breath and looked at John. “But… You and me?… We’re brothers… Nothing changes that.”

Watching the turmoil in John’s eyes was like watching waves crash against a rocky shore on a stormy day. But there was a light there too. Slowly, the younger boy’s mouth began to twitch into something resembling a smile. “Yeah?”

Smiling, Daniel nodded. “Yeah. Always.” He held out his hand, grinning when John clasped it and agreed, “Always.”

**Author's Note:**

> I am planning more stories in this series.


End file.
